The Moment I Realized I Didn't Have a Mother

Sometimes a single moment, a single experience in a person's life, can be so defining, and so mind-opening, that it changes everything. 

An epiphany. A realization of one's own reality, that was not there before. That "ah ha" moment. You get the idea....

The Five Minute Face: For Busy Moms

Check out this fantastic quick makeup for everyday. Every mom needs a five minute makeup routine to have them looking good fast! This is the makeup tutorial for you!

BEING MARRIED AS AN INTROVERT

I need alone time a lot more than my husband does. My husband and I have had this same controversy for our entire 14 years together.  After doing some research (and talking with other couples), it turns out this is a common problem. Everyone needs alone time, but often in a marriage, one person needs more of it than the other.  This can lead to insecurity and resentment, if not communicated well. 

SOMETIMES IT'S OK TO BE "NOT OK"

 As wives and mothers, we are often "not ok", but how many of us trudge through anyway? How many of us put on a smile and pretend that we're doing fine, when in reality, we are really just "not ok"? 

MY ESTRANGED MOTHER REACHED OUT TO ME (AND HERE IS WHAT HAPPENED)

My estranged mother recently "reached out" to me via Facebook Messenger. I was hopeful, for some signs of remorse, and expressions of "motherly love", so I made the mistake of engaging with her. I should have known better, but I suppose I am eternally optimistic.

MOTHER'S DAY 2022

Being a mother is hard, and we mamas deserve a day that celebrates us, and all the hard work we put into raising our children! Mother's Day is the one day a year, that we get to be selfish, and put ourselves first (for once)! This Mother's Day started off right, with my husband surprising me by making me a big breakfast (I don't usually eat breakfast), and giving me flowers, and a card. 

TOXIC PARENTING: HOW MY PARENTS FAILED ME

 

In the past, I have written on the subjects of toxic parenting and child estrangement, because these are subjects that I know all too well. I wanted to share my experience with toxic parents, in greater detail. I know a lot of you out there have dealt with, or are currently dealing with, one or both parents who have failed you. Parents who have let you down. Parents who have hurt and damaged you beyond words. I have not one, but two toxic parents, who have continuously failed me throughout adulthood. They failed my older brother also. My sweet, beautiful brother, tragically ended up drinking himself to death, at the age of 44. 

THOUGHTS ON SAHM'S VS. WORKING MOMS

I constantly hear women defending themselves for being "working moms". It seems like a lot of working moms feel (or are made to feel) some degree of guilt for choosing to have careers versus spending their days at home caring for their children. Yet, American society as a whole, tends to look down on women who don't work. The expectation for women to stay home and raise children, has been replaced with the expectation for women to bring home a paycheck.  As a result, I also constantly hear stay-at-home moms (SAHM's) defending their choice to not work, and for making motherhood their main priority.  I think it's sad that we, as mothers, would try to tear down any other mother, when we all know how hard motherhood is. I mean, it's not as if being a mother is some minor, inconsequential role in life. I very much understand, and can relate to, both sides of this proverbial coin.  

Toxic Parenting and Estranged Children

Caveat: This is a very touchy subject, and one that I have read countless articles, forums, and discussions on: "Toxic Parenting and Child Estrangement".  I have researched and have considered many points of view.  I realize there are exceptions, such as drug addiction, parental alienation, and/or a physically abusive child. This post does not include those types of cases, and I am not judging any parent who is estranged from their child for reasons such as those stated above. 

YOUR CHILD'S INNER VOICE

Being a parent is arguably the biggest responsibility one can ever have in life. How we parent our children, determines how they will view themselves, the world, and how they will one day parent their own children. That is why it is so important, not to damage them. It's crucial to provide plenty of encouragement and praise, while still guiding them on the principles of right and wrong.  

Supporting My Children Once They're Grown

This is a subject I have been giving a lot of thought on lately. When does a parent's financial obligation to their child/children end? At 18, any legal financial obligation ends, but isn't there a moral obligation that still exists? For some parents, no. For my husband and I, yes! A  parent's obligation to their child does not end when they turn 18, when they graduate college, or even when they get married and have children of their own. A parent's obligation to their child does not end until the day they die! Being a parent is a lifelong role. 

SENDING KIDS BACK TO SCHOOL DURING COVID-19: UPDATE

Initially, my children's school district was offering two options for students returning to school. Option 1: Fully Remote. Option 2: Fully In-Person. Then, at the very last minute, they decided to have *all* students go fully remote. I was hoping for a hybrid (2-day-a-week) model, but was happy that at least all students would be "in the same boat" with remote learning. 

Sending Kids Back To School During Covid-19

As the upcoming school year approaches, instead of feeling joy and excitement, all I feel is dread. This coming school year I will have a second grader and ninth grader.  I have two days to decide if I am going to send my children back to school five days a week, or enroll them in online classes at home. Both options have serious drawbacks.  I feel like all I have to choose from is a bad option or another bad option.  

INFERTILITY JOURNEY

This is a subject I was unsure I wanted to address. My story is a painful one to tell...like so many other wishful mama's who have dealt with, or who are currently dealing with, infertility...I really despise that word. What it really means is "you can't have the thing you desire most in this world. You can't feel that joy and love." I would not wish it on my worst enemy. The desire to be a mother, is stronger than any I have ever felt.  

LIVING WITH A COLICKY BABY

This is a subject near and dear to my heart. My little Noly has not slept more than two to three hours at a time, since the day he was born.

STAYING HOME

Stay-at-home-moms (SAHM's) versus working moms. A hot topic, that many women feel defensive about, on both sides. I want to be clear that I do not judge any mom for her choice to work or not to work. I know that not every woman wishes to stay at home with her children. In fact, MOST of my friends are working moms, and are happy! But I also have friends who work and are miserable!  Mothers who want to stay home with their children, but feel like it would be impossible to survive on one income.